- in the name of Allah -

O Fashioner of the Heavens, O Living One, O Sustainer of Life..

Relieve the difficulties that Muslims are facing in America, and around the world. Make every person of this ummah someone to care about and take care of. Grant shifa'aa, 'aajilan and kaamilan, to those who are sick, and suffering. Give sakeenah to the hearts who pulsate under stress and struggle. Protect our deen from trial, and make us as models for the rest of mankind.

Ameen, O Lord of the


- in the name of Allah -

sometimes I am given pause to wonder just what is the role of one who thinks in this dunya. if we are not involved, do we devolve? are our struggles to integrate schisms of digression, or efforts worthy of investment? I saw something I did not know I would see, yet its meaning and force could not have been felt any more. it brings me to another question, what do we want for others? do we want the same things for them as we do ourselves? if they have attained happiness, then can that, should that be enough? to remove any unnecessary guessing, it was her. a happily married picture. an amalgamation of emotions rose that yielded this very fine point: though sadness can be and oftentimes is inevitable, happiness need not exclude itself from it; one can be both happy and sad, simultaneously. alhamdulillah, this isn't a time, there are no more such times for me, where reminiscing becomes a tragic, vogue tendency. I...have moved on. it is time I unpublished the other blog, and pursue greater meaning, from


- in the name of Allah -

(all of this is relevant only to the Muslim ummah, no one else)

After a few days of working at the local masjid, I have made a few observations worthy of being mentioned. It seems that a majority of the sisters of the ummah have a "princess complex", and that would have been fine, had the brothers not also been afflicted with a "fallen prince complex".

Let me elaborate. What I know of female psychology, I know from both textbooks and personal experience, so if it offends anyone, then my condolences beforehand. What I know of male psychology, I know from both textbooks and the fact that I am one. The current trend I am noticing is that sisters are unwilling to shoulder more responsibility than was expected from them according to previous generations of social experience; in the past, a female would have been relegated to roles primarily situated in the "home" and would be considered the primary "caretaker" of the children. Not only were the males expected to provide the income for the family, they were expected to do all the "dirty" and "thankless" work that needed to be done but was obviously undesirable in and of itself (to be fair, the women had their share of such roles). Still, for a number of generations, the males were those who could and would do the work, and so there was some stability as far the family structure goes on a global scale, and how much respect each community and nation paid to its notion in keeping the "family" going attested to this.

These past two generations of males, entailing the last 50-100 years or so, have missed their mark. How can I say this? I can say this by observing the elders of our community, and communities, and by noticing as well the changes in behavior, from what it was expected to have been.

The results of two and a half world wars gives ample evidence for how the failure of the male has come, such a grand scale that it almost passes without notice, almost becoming a listless "evolving" of the male caricature. This is the nature of the "fallen prince complex": the prince being the former role once held by the past generations of Muslim men, who now having fallen from power and from "grace", now suffer a useless ignominy rooted in pride without substance or reason. This is our state today, as men. It is akin to the aging monarch, who sees and has seen his time to rule pass, but cannot and does not know how to convey power or educate the coming generation. Will our generation suffer as our fathers and their fathers suffered? How long can our "princesses" manage the ummah, while our "fallen princes" lament a past long gone?
How can we reclaim our place among the nations of this world, and find the throne of the dunya once again in the hands of those who believe?


- in the name of Allah -

Came across this quote while checking my email (it was part of an ad or something):

Martin Luther - 'Who loves not women, wine and song remains a fool his whole life long.'"

What interested me about it is the ayah in suratul-Baqarah, when the disbelievers/hypocrites exclaimed "should we believe as the fools believe?" - paraphrased. SubhanAllah. This is so in line with the quote above, as disbelievers love 'women, wine, and song', while the Muslim is required to understand why these things function as vice, and to abstain from them (obvious exception to women - marriage). They call us fools if we love not these things as they do; I, for one, would rather then live my entire life as a such a fool, and then see, in the end, who was truly foolish.


- in the name of Allah -

It should come as no surprise that as one climbs closer to Allah, the struggles of the nafs become magnified, and every one becomes an epic battle, each side wondering where my end will be. On the one hand, there is call of the dunya, alluring with all of its vice and wealth and promise of fortune. On the other hand, there is the call of the akhirah, ever steady in its call to enjoin the good and forbid what is evil. It is in these moments of in between where our allegiance is truly tested, where we truly decide whether or not to become or remain people of Allah, or be left to our own devices. I do not regret the struggles, for they make me realize just how precious hidaya (guidance) is, and just how much we need to nourish it with dhikr to make it last, and to make our end, insha'Allah, one of serenity and purpose.

It's been awhile since I feel like something of substance has been written. Maybe...

Choose Your Side

roses and trees, swift rivers and streams, fruit close at hand with no ill will among neighbors and no unease. days and nights merge into one, an outline for eternity begun but never done. fair maidens and favorite friends, mellow companions giving thanks without end. valleys to explore, mysteries becoming only opened doors to understanding more. perhaps most important, a feeling unscripted and without description, happily contented satisfaction brimming over and beyond the notion of bliss, could there be a place such as this?

furnaces and forks, boiling water and pus the main entree served without remorse. screams and wails dot the moments that never finish passing, nails on coffins everlasting. death no more but anguish renewed, their numbers many but their meaning askew. pain and regret, give meaning to disobedience and consequence to the derelict. no smiling faces, only frowns and gaping mouths twisted into permanent scowls, wishes of respite denied quickly and contrite as they themselves denied the truth in life. suffering needs no depiction, but how many know the cure to this affliction?


- in the name of Allah -

If I was in pieces before, then now I am whole, not because I stand on my own, but because Allah gives me the strength to take command of my soul and follow the truth down any dark or lightened road.

[...a bit later..]

I've built crystalline castles in a past lacking in hustle but full of hassle, the goals I thought I'd meet turned out to be stallions without saddles. Dreams crumbled to dust, but rain fell from the heavens and it became fertile with trust and care, so suddenly what wasn't there appeared, making the path ahead one less thing to fear. I still wonder just how many people I will come to know and have lost, owing to neglect or too great a personal cost. The world spins on capitalist wheels, with an engine of greed and a windshield of blindness concealed. They call these things excuses I peddle, avoiding strain and effort in a society where work taxes and drains until the mind is numb and doesn't remember what to testify or proclaim. To be a part of something, yes the desire is there, but here, now?, in this colossal deceit where the ends justify the means? I hold out as long as I can, until tendrils of fate catch up to me, lacerations unabated of truths they call unequivocal in nature, but in truer reality, a figment of secondary imagining created to satiate those with questions felt but unstated. Perhaps I'm lazy, but it doesn't stop the world from being bloodthirsty over money and willing to debase anything and anyone as long as the cogs in the chain remain acquiescent and believably repentant.

At the very least, they can't claim our minds and the innards of our being, these parts forever will be ours with which to pray and beseech the One above for a path out of this madness to a grave of greater peace and a future worthwhile in the hereafter.


- in the name of Allah -

It is a sad day when the one you ask forgiveness from forgives you for a wrong they think you feel remorseful for, when in fact, the truth is the anguish of swallowing an emotional injustice whose true meaning only Allah understands. Ultimately, good does become of it, and to a higher place do we go.