11.29.2016

- in the name of Allah - 

It's strange sometimes, to see one's self inside a set of pixels, a picture not even mine but still it's as if 'me' is scattered somewhere, everywhere, inside of it. Trying to grasp meaning, somehow I am reflected within shades of the red. 

I've found many little pricks on this road of life, pricks from thorns found in places all along the path, except in these pixels. Little parts leak out of me, trickles and streams of a different kind of red, reminding what the journey is all about. 

There are no laments for this pain, no laments of things behind, just hope for what is still ahead. May Allah make firm my standing, my reaching for Him, my finding Him always near and pleased, ameen. 

11.28.2016

- in the name of Allah -

Just because fate has chosen something for you instead of you choosing it for yourself doesn’t mean it has to be bad. Even if it’s something you are sure you would never have chosen in a hundred years. Better ten days of love than years of regretting,’ ”


Just started Book 3 in WoT. It is amazing. Similarly to ASoIaF, though with its own quirks. One of these days I may stop posting random quotes, but I doubt it; it just resonates deeply. 

In not really relatedness, I regret not a step of the road I've been on in life, walhamdulillah. Sometimes one's own life can be seen in the semblance of a Pattern, with its own stylistic weaves and threads. Knowing where I am, where I've been, I would change nothing. If had not the past I have had, how else would shape the future that I seek of dreams in Firdaus? 

11.27.2016

- in the name of Allah -

Death is lighter than a feather, duty heavier than a mountain.

 

11.19.2016

- in the name of Allah -

WoT:

What a strange thing to say,” Egwene said. “Why do they use it like that? Peace.”

When you have never known a thing except to dream,” Lan replied, heeling Mandarb forward, “it becomes more than a talisman.

11.18.2016

- in the name of Allah -

 ~~~~~
 "a picture is worth a thousand words" - not even close

 I couldn't even begin to count them, adding up all the words that trace their lineage somehow back to the k. it'd be like taking a tally of sand grains on a beach...that extended for miles as far as eyes could see. the impact of before's and after's, like comets that came from nowhere but landed everywhere and left their mark in the middle of me. from a break so complete I couldn't even recognize my own pieces, to a re-made mirror so perfect every light shined off it simply seamless: I've known sadness that warped into despair and swallowed whole, and I've known hope that became the brightest and best wings ever known. --- so I can say, having tasted both sides of the coin, bitter and sweet: "A Picture is Priceless, only when it's a colored-red dream". 
~~~~~


Every so often I get an inkling to throw a pebble over this divide, see how far the ripples flow, get a sense of how times passes on the other side. I reckon if a few words could manifest themselves into such light and beauty, what then would something of length find? It could be a trap, Allah knows mistakes are easier to make when they're painted in all the right colors and shapes. 'Good intents' and all that, most likely. So I'll keep my pebbles here, by my side, building this mountain bit by bit, till I climb it with Allah's help all the way to Firdaus in Paradise. And when I find that gate, before the angel beckons salaam, around I'll glance for your visage, to crown it the diamond of my triumph's shade, and thus evolves dream from hope into simply true, to reignite the 'y' in 'you'.

 

11.12.2016

- in the name of Allah -

WoT:

"Your carneira wears part of your soul as a ribbon in her hair forever."


 Quite true.
- in the name of Allah -


My God, how beautiful this moon, how blessed I am to see things so far through. So round, so bright, water tears in falling, His bounty coming like rain I couldn't hold it all, gratitude pours forth a river all my life in making. My own efforts I swear they're but like ants or faded glass, ready to be crushed or shatter, at the tiniest push a house alone would never last. But He firms my foundation, reconciles my heart, patches the holes that my own infirmity starts. By God I wish I could give Him a speck of what He's given me, this light this road this everything I see, every angle every aspect doesn't matter where I look His gift encompasses, what do I show in turn? where does my response go? how can I repay, what I barely fathom, when I could never deserve any of it with my own deeds, my own futility shows itself and I wish I move toward Him ever close that even this sadness He conceals beneath the shade of thrones or trees. It's there, it's always been, Oh people passing through, God is calling, always He has, answer Him, His mercy, guidance, light, they're the best fruits of this life that otherwise is starved, unsated, never a moment but lies try to drown out truth. I envision the Garden, the place I hope to find, the bounty, the ridwaan from Allah, I have known no serenity more still, and I am one to embrace serenity as a rule. It is...guidance is, so utterly precious. My God, there is no comparison to submission. What it means to believe, to know one's place with respect to Allah, to know Allah's place over all else. Treasure belief, treasure it because we humanity are not the gift given to religion, it is the gift given for us. The second we think we are above it or need it not...so begins doom for the soul. And if the soul is lost, what else could there possibly be worth to gain? 
- in the name of Allah -


Autumn is such a beautiful season alh. Officially and by far my favorite. A fond farewell to winter, loved it when I was younger but cold has a way of stifling that's just as bad practically as it is conceptually. 

If I had to consider it, I would say it's the twin of spring. While the cold of winter contrasts perfectly with the heat of summer, the temperate though opposite nature of autumn and spring is something unique. They're alike in one hand, having much less extremity of temperature, yet flowing in different directions: one from death to life, the other of life fading to death.Truly it's the color that makes autumn what it is. Such a splendor mA, unmatched by any other time of year. 

Wish I had something else to pen too, but every time I come back here and read some of my recent posts, I often find that what I want to say has already been said. It's like having a glass in hand and thinking it's empty and needs to be filled, yet when I pick it up and look inside the glass, the water's always full. True there is always some repetition of words and themes throughout my writing, but I can't recall a time where I've been 'expressed out' just by reading something recent. I'll just have to find something more to picture here iA. 


 

11.03.2016

- in the name of Allah -


Ya komla: whenever clouds come, the kind without rain, hold fast in patience, don't let the moment pass in vain. when days turn to mush, and seconds mimic agony of eons, breathe, recall the gardens green and lush. when the tongue begs to speak its piece, in ways untoward or from harm, then remind it of its place, putting on its leash. wherever you walk, whoever you meet, take with you the best of what you find, and the rest just leave. 

I still seek that eternity, the same I've always sought: one with our orbits close, where I've found with my Rabb, all which calms the heart.