- in the name of Allah -


A journey

I didn't start this on my own, nor was it something I even initially sought. The two beacons I came to know, were brought into my orbit by Allah, and given how those early years were spent, would keep them close enough that their light became something I'd always cherish. 

People often speak of destiny when they approach something they don't understand or can't grasp, but it's just as true in those rare cases we can grasp it, can see the causes and effects in our lives that are so potent because they originate outside of our own will. It's one thing for a person to wake up one day and say he or she will set out to accomplish something, then does so. It is completely another when something entirely outside of one's vision comes into view, settles in the soul like a seed in the earth, and grows there, unimpeded (!) by the predation of one's own self or outside forces. There are innumerable layers of blessings from Allah in this. I fear I can never truly convey to people just how deeply I know this good is from Him, it's beyond knowledge, but rather the most basic essence of me I have ever fathomed. There were so many saving graces, blessings beyond counting, where He kept me intact and made my beacons not as sources of corruption but as tests and guiding lights in the purest sense. Perhaps they reflected me, but I know for certain I reflected them, and so when good compounds with good, there is a resonating effect whereby only khair gets passed between them and what's lesser just gets left behind. 

This phenomenon reminds me of one of the most beautiful ayaat in the Quran:

"...Light upon light. Allah guides to His light whom He pleases,..." [Surah An-Nur, part of Verse 35]

SubhanaAllah. Definitely, without question, any good we ever find, any good we ever knew, all of it is only from Allah.