Expressed

أَعُوذُ بِٱللَّهِ مِنَ ٱلشَّيۡطَٰنِ ٱلرَّجِيمِ، بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ

 

 

imagine if i could just sweep aside the clouds, with a wave of my hands, see you shining so clearly, no matter where i lived, no matter what this life shows us it has. God, how i hate the barriers and distances, mechanisms of our safety but agonizing my atoms, which would rather just fly off with you in endless collisions, recreate matter at their whim, energy absorbed and released in terms proportionally glorious as physical and supernoval. alhamdulillah, He's sufficed my path in this life, giving me breath beyond my choices but right within His designs...but this, this present moment, these present tranquilities (alh) and trials, hardships and eases, this place with its murmurs ever-heard and whispers teeming, it isn't mine, for our unity hasn't yet happened, like a comet waiting (for what seems like) forever to arc its ellipse around the sun and find its way back into the cloud it first started from. for me, there's no Garden if the Garden hasn't your light, your mirroring and your acceptance, the sound of your joyful laughter and smile, ingrained in my mind like an echo i can nearly at-will bring to the front of sight. sometimes i wonder, how does anyone ever get a memory like i've been given, so unpredicted and unknowably coming, visiting me in my moments most trying, but embedding within me like it belonged there all along since our beginning..of course it's been, unity and mutual, infinite expansion within each other's arms, i figure this was our goal since we were kids, in terms simpler but perhaps lacking in beauty i can now wrap them with. there's no question i'll meet Him again, be questioned for all that i did, be shown the good and my ill, but as my Rabb is my witness, you are part of my constellation, its intrinsic star, its minimum and maximum, and holding you forever - this remains utterly and for ever what i seek from Him.