Reflections on a Connection

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ

Finding Allah has nothing to do with what any other person on the planet does, or what their opinions are, or what their actions are, or what their choices are. This particular state/goal has only ever been a uniquely-personal relationship and covenant between the Creator and the created one. Sometimes we may think to take the cues for religiosity or even spirituality from other creation, seeing what they do and what they say and what their (apparent) level of accomplishment is...this taking of cues from mere mortals is the worst possible idea in the history of ideas, because the vast majority of humankind, probably since near the beginning of time, have been engulfed in an aura of unawareness (ghafla). Granted, there is one primary existential exception to this: the ways of the Rasool (saw) and the ones who lived and breathed in his time. 

So if one does not look to the examples of contemporaries to understand what and why and how a spiritual connection to Allah is demonstrated, then practically speaking, how and from where? I can only give a personal answer to this question, which is reflection upon one's own self. Being able to understand the journey one has taken, its ups and downs, the blessings and trials, the losses and gains, the entirety of a lifetime lived up until the present...all of these, for me and I'd hope any other who did an honest self-assessment and realization, lead back to Allah in every respect. 

It is possible, as I get the sense sometimes, that my Rabb has given me more to be grateful for than anyone else alive. I feel like that every so often. I can't qualify this, as He gives to whomever He wishes, but I can attest to the truth that whomsoever shows gratitude, He increases them in blessing. Noting that human gratitude will never approach remotely what Allah is due, I've recalled shukr every so often and so I have my own experience as proof for what has been said in the matter.

The deeds we do connected to faith have nothing to do with other people, others don't matter AT ALL in this regard. If I may be blunt, fuck everyone else when it comes to this - one's Creator is the only One Who should be feared or beloved when it comes to why/how/when/etc we perform whatever it is He lets us be capable of doing. Looking to other people's actions and apparent contradictions between their supposed state and actual/real state...gives one no impetus for improving or being closer to Allah...instead it does the opposite, making us disillusioned and cynical and perhaps even bitter about the state of the world and life (I should know, my past tells that story). 

Lifetime incremental improvement or hope will never ever, in the history of ever, be found or obtained from looking at or thinking of mortal human beings (with a singular exception of my Rasool[saw]; reflecting on what he may have done in current situations often is amazing). There are aspects of truth that can only ever be reached by looking upward and seeking Allah, learning of Him, understanding what humanly is possible, and then taking means of approach such as the most common and commanded one: salaat. 

Nomad that I am, I've traveled a long, looooong, looooooooooooooooooooooooooong road in matters like this and general life wayfaring, and still traveling fyi. I suppose it's not yet possible for me to share my eyes with my beloved, but if and when that chance ever comes, I will iA. Though complacency should always be challenged because our present is never good enough, even if contentment is as easy as being close to nature or spending time with fam. Among the foremost and constant of wishes is that He lets me reach and keep close all of the amazing and unfathomably-special ones that He Himself has allowed me to know since the beginning, ameen.