بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ

SubhanaAllah, how a few words and a few days change perspective. Not a week ago, it was some deep lesson in continuously giving regardless of what I thought received, and today, something I receive, somewhat unexpectedly, and I'm reminded of an essential lesson that I often forget.

I do not live for today, it is not in this very second that my aims can be found, but rather, I live for Tomorrow. Not just an akhirah beyond (and inclusive of) imagining, but also the more immediate part of the road ahead, maybe some months from now inshaAllah when I can bring my Gift home. What happens in the intermediate time, is not the finding or needing of any fulfillment, but each day closer to that point is another door opened in the seemingly-vast maze of doors towards what I seek. 

Somehow, alhamdulillah, the notion settled in me today that what I look for isn't and can't be found right now, and shouldn't be. Each of these moments is a seed being planted, watered, given as much sun and light as it might need, so that for what lies ahead, I might reap with my Rabb's permission the fruit of what I've sown. I think I placed too much expectation for my Gift to reciprocate as I would right away, as love might expect, but these things don't happen by my timetable, but my understanding. She grows, expresses, in ever more surprising ways, ways that bring their growing pains invariably, but just as well, when there comes a moment we resonate, everything endured is easily accepted and the hope of what is truly sought becomes steeled and firm. 

And of the road when she arrives? A series of challenges I've never known, but just as beautifully coupled with joys made manifest that I've barely begun to fathom. I know less than I think I do, though I don't think I really know anything. Remarkable. How the human being is dwarfed by his own ignorance even if he perceives himself to be not aware of much. Alhamdulillah though, my Rabb continues His support of me, without which I would be nothing nor aim for anything. But, He sustains and so I am kept.