frailty

أَعُوذُ بِٱللَّهِ مِنَ ٱلشَّيۡطَٰنِ ٱلرَّجِيمِ، بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ

days like this, where you come to mind but my tongue recalls to me only illness, can't even savor from it any sorrow or happiness, just grounded by being lost from my own normal, inside a world turned upside down like i'd never imagined. numbness in extremities, the wrong kind and for all the wrong reasons, slowly is easing, but couple treatments left, so there's still something of bitter pills for me to be unwillingly taking. wouldn't be so bad if i could only lean back-to-back with my beloved, not even seeing, for such a moment everything in this life i'd give away in an instant...alas, i am struck by absence as a tree loves for lightning to scald and char all its leaves and branches, which is to say not in the slightest, it's hateful and i'd reject it if my Rabb gave me His permission, but He hasn't, not yet, living is onward, my goal around a corner only He can help me conquer.

one Day, iA